My daughter is still free from heroin. She will be starting college in August and I'm so proud of her. We don't talk about it [heroin] anymore. She doesn't want to talk about it...she doesn't want to think about it. These days its like it never happened. Shes a very different person now.
Sometimes, I have to be very careful about what I say to her. For example, [I say, "wow I don't think you should be doing that because you might mess up] ..she immediately thinks I'm talking about heroin...I can tell by the way she looks at me...then I have to make myself clear. I'm just happy that she's not using heroin and hasn't used since February 2008.
I watched as she struggled to stay away from her friends that used....friends that still use. She told me that when she sees them driving around [they just nod]...she's no longer in the group. Sometimes she misses them but mainly she just stays away and they stay away from her. They know that she's clean and I think they wish they were but for some reason they just can't do it....I wonder if after a while you just give up, tell yourself you can't quit so you just stop trying. I just wish kids and adults would stop and think before they use heroin...its a horrible, horrible addiction.
I still think that she wouldn't be clean if it weren't for suboxone. I really believe that it was the key to her success along with other techniques like staying away from users, places, etc. and most importantly going to a counseler. She has been off the suboxone for about 6 months or longer...I can't remember now.
It took me a while to be able to relax....but now I'm relaxed but I'll never forget what happened to my teenager who made a horrible choice to use heroin. She has a diary about her addiction...of course, she doesn't read it. She'd like to publish it one day.
